So much of society praises the busyness we find ourselves in constantly. If you have a packed to-do list or a full calendar, then you must have a full life, right?
So then why are so many of us burnt out, stressed out and constantly looking for ways to decompress?
One of the biggest problems we face as Christians when we pack our schedules is that we don’t often leave room for God’s will in our busy plans. This can cause us to very easily overlook the things that God may be calling us to which can lead to mixed up priorities and worthless idols.
Think about it, you fill your schedule with the necessary things first, like work and family events, and then slowly activities and hobbies fill in the gaps. Then, add in your kids’ sports schedules, date nights and dinners out with friends and suddenly you don’t have a free night to spare for that Bible study you’ve really been wanting to be a part of.
We Do This With Our Everyday Tasks Too.
When you start your day in the morning, do you schedule every microsecond with a task that needs to be done? I’m definitely guilty of this one. What can I say? I like to be efficient! And while that’s not a bad thing, when my desire to be efficient comes before my desire to listen to God and help a friend or visit a loved one that hasn’t been doing well, then it becomes a problem.
We can’t live our lives so rigidly that we don’t have time for a minor conversation with a neighbor or a brief phone call to check on a friend we haven’t heard from in a while. We can’t be racing around the house getting stuff done so much that we don’t stop to notice that one of our kids didn’t have a great day at school and needs some lovin’. We can’t run around so much that we don’t have any space to spend quality time with the ones we love most; the ones that God called us to care for first.
So How Do We Fix It?
It seems silly but it’s honestly so simple: we learn to say no.
No to the unnecessary things that only bring us more stress and anxiety (hello, mindless scrolling).
No to the thousands of sports events in the tons of different activities that our kids need to be a part of to have a fulfilling childhood.
No to the things that God convicts us of, that we know we shouldn’t be spending time doing and yet we view them as some sort of coping mechanism that will help us with the rest of life.
No to the events every night of the week that will inevitably prevent us from making or sitting down for a healthy meal with our family.
No to the chaos.
Learning to say “no” in a healthy way is not mean, it’s healthy. It allows you to set appropriate boundaries for you and your family to keep the peace in your home. Learning to say “no” allows you wiggle room to allow God to work in your life because you do have an extra 5 minutes to spare. Learning to say “no” not only reduces your stress, but it allows you to grow in your faith and grow closer to God.
Try Setting Up Systems
I know, I know, this sounds completely contradictory. I just said to not overschedule every second of the day, but setting up systems is better? Actually, it is. Setting up systems is a way to minimize time doing necessary things and maximize time for everything else.
If I feel the need to be efficient, I can focus that feeling on efficiently getting through my morning routine so that I can be fully present with my kids when they wake up.
I can plan things like grocery shopping and meal prepping while on my way home from work so that when I get home, I can spend more time with my family.
I can do all of my housework/chores/errands on one day so that I can focus on others the rest of the week.
All of these are great options. This is something that I have been trying to teach my kids as well. When they get home from school, they can do their homework, do their chores and then they are free to do whatever they would like. We have time to play a game as a family or watch a movie without worrying that we didn’t get something done. (Now I know that kids are a little different and sometimes need a break but for the most part, we try to do this.)
Look For Opportunities
If we free up our schedules but don’t do anything with our extra time, then it often goes to waste. Be intentional about spending time with your family and friends or serving others. Ask God at the beginning of the day what He has for you. Try to look around when you’re at the grocery store or the pick up line at school and reach out to others.
When Jesus gave us the Great Commission, He told us to “go and make disciples,” not “relax and do whatever you want, you deserve it.” God knows that there are things that we have to get done every day but we know that there are a lot of other things we usually end up doing that weren’t necessary and the time we wasted could be better spent.
Set your priorities on God and He’ll take care of the rest.
“Do not worry then, saying, ‘What are we to eat?’ or ‘What are we to drink?’ or ‘What are we to wear for clothing?’ For the Gentiles eagerly seek all these things; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be provided to you.”
Matthew 6:31-33 NASB2020
